Miss A had been such a sweet baby until the day she started throwing tantrums. The next moment I found myself upset and all confused. I took a moment and tried recalling my mother’s advise, that the day you feel that your baby has started testing your limits, and you feel like spanking her, calm down and put yourself in her shoes and question,
· How does it feel to be so small when everyone else around is so big?
· To fall short of words to express your feelings, needs and thoughts?
· To have so little control over what you eat, what you wear, when you sleep?
Surprisingly, my reaction to above was anger, frustration, and boredom!
Immediately, I could see what my child was feeling and I was able to face those testing moments with more understanding, patience and effective actions.
Toddlers throw temper tantrums as a way of expressing their anger and frustrations. Small things, incidents and issues that may be insignificant to us, can be very important to children. If we can be considerate about these issues and keep a thoughtful mind, we can turn difficult situations into special bonding moments. By taking a step back, and comparing the small events in your kid’s life with the events of your life, you can build a safe and loving connection together.
And in those difficult moments, keep in mind, “This too shall pass”.
A lovely poem which is very close to my heart:
If I had my child to raise all over again.
If I had my child to raise all over again,
I’d finger-paint more, and point the fingers less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I’d take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I’d take more hikes and fly more kites.
I’d stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
I’d do more hugging and less tugging.
I’d build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I’d teach less about the love of power, And more about the power of love.